The Inner Game of Breakups

This entry was posted Sunday, 6 November, 2011 at 2:15 am

When you go through a break-up, it can be one of the hardest things to go through. Not only do you have to pick up the pieces of your life and move on, but you also need to deal with all the troubling thoughts, emotional turmoil, stream of what-if thinking and self-doubt.

What do you do about it and how can you get your mind in order?

Well, firstly, it’s important to know this is truly about you. A large amount of folk could have trouble coping with a split because they have an inclination to look outside of themselves for authorization or to feel good.

But , you have to see that how you’re feeling is entirely about you and how you focus your brain.

Some “dating experts” might call this “inner game.” Inner game is essentially about how you believe and how you see yourself. It encompasses your sentiments about yourself, the world around you, and your ex.

If you are fighting with your emotions and your total contentment after your split up, there’s a good chance that you could be having inner game problems.

O.K, you could be thinking, I feel bad, and that is my fault. So, what can I do about it?

Well, the first thing is to understand that negative thoughts come from targeting your thoughts on what you do not need. That’s right, any time you feel bad, emotionally, it is because you are brooding about something you do not want, do not have, or lost.

Take a moment and think about it. Isn’t that true?

Here’s what you can do about it. You can simply change your thoughts and think about something that you do want as an alternative.

That may seem a bit simple, and there is definitely a lot more when you get down into the details, but if you can really change your thoughts and get yourself to contemplate positive things or enjoy your own life, you will start to feel a bit better.

When you concentrate on what you want, you can immediately feel good. Rather than worrying about what might occur if you can’t get her back, wondering why “my ex girlfriend hates me,” or if he is really gone for good, you can start to drift back into those unproductive thoughts.

It can be a lot of work to maintain your concentration on what you desire. But with a bit of practice you are going to be able to improve and it will get less complicated. In fact, concentrating on what you need feels great, right? Therefore wouldn’t you naturally begin to do more of that if it led on to you feeling better about your life and letting go of the pain of the split?

If you found this helpful, also check out how to get my ex girlfriend back and how to get your girlfriend back.. Free reprint available from: The Inner Game of Breakups.