Thinking About Dating A Woman With 4 Children - Advice?
Just considering it, but I’ve never dated a woman with children before.
So I know I might be biting off more than I can chew here.
She is a great woman and appears - seems to be - a great mother. What might I be getting myself into?
T says:
January 19th, 2010 at 2:09 pm
Oh, there are whole books that don’t cover this subject! But if you really like her and really like kids, it can be done!
What would you get yourself into? Not going out on school nights; science fair projects; LOTS of whining/bickering; picnics at the park and tossing the football around; jealousy about some of her very limited time being spent with you and maybe your jealousy over not having enough time with her; getting to know FIVE other personalities (hers and the kids) and bonding with all of them; lots of kids’ birthday parties; being a good male role model the kids can learn from; general noisiness for no great reason; being around when the ex decides to act jealous or cause problems . . .
It is a lot, and not every man could do this, so take it slow. Ashton and Demi make it work, but they have a lot of money and the kids are pretty much grown.
The fact that you are even considering this wins lots of brownie points with me, and I don’t even know you!
Anya says:
January 19th, 2010 at 2:43 pm
You’re only dating her, not marrying her. It’s not like you have to commit to anything right now, so why not? You already think she’s great so at least you should see how compatible you are.
You don’t say, however, how old the kids are. I would think if they’re younger, then you of course realize you will be with them (and her) almost non-stop, except when you guys can get a babysitter. If they are a bit older, they’re out with friends and doing things elsewhere but you still have to be their taxi. So basically, your life will be about the kids. Which, is not a bad thing…if you enjoy kids then you would probably do well as a father figure. But, these kids will also cost major $$$…..so you have to really weigh all these things….sure your relationship with the woman comes first but you have to decide if marrying into four kids is something you really want. If she is still really great after you’ve dated for some time, then you’ll get a better idea if staying with her is the right thing for you. Good luck!!
Badminton Equipment says:
January 19th, 2010 at 8:23 pm
It’s one of the reasons single moms pretty much remain single moms (until the kids are gone), and why women ought to know the sire of their children well before opting to have any with him……
In nature, it just isn’t evolutionarily in any male’s interest to invest in offspring not his own. Male lions, for example kill the offspring of the pride they are take over…. to bring her into season again. And she herself prevents ovulation until he is bonded to the pride and knows the offspring will be his.
Though this isn’t an exact parallel with humans, step parents remain pretty much that…step parents, and outside the realm of another man’s children. It is a rare step parent indeed who can bond to another’s children….particularly step fathers.
If you aren’t interested in parenting, as my dad always said, “never shop in a store in which you plan to buy nothing.” The lady comes with children. If that isn’t in your agenda, shop in a different store.
Tarot Readings online by an experienced Psychic says:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:19 am
A bunch of not very bright answers here…
The older you get, the higher the likelihood you’ll be dating a woman with kids.
Kids are not evil and women with kids shouldn’t be treated like lepers.
I dated a few women without kids… in spite of all the lip service about how they think it’s great that I have kids… they just don’t get it. It’s an experience that one has to have to be able to appreciate.
Say What? says:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:27 am
Don’t do it. Avoid single mothers all together. Unless you are a serious loser, you can do better.
Will you like having to plan your sex life around 4 kids?
How many fathers are there? You know they’ll always be there.
If it turns serious, she’ll expect you to start footing the bill!
If you knock her up, you know she’s not having an abortion, you’ll be sucker number 5 paying her child support.
Is this really the best you can do? Some broad with four crumb crunchers? Don’t you have more respect for yourself than this?
Common sense isn't anymore.. says:
January 20th, 2010 at 4:50 am
4 kids?
Hmmm, that is a tough one. If you really think she is great, date her. But don’t meet the kids until you know it is going some place, it is wrong to put kids in it if it isn’t going to turn into anything.
Kazuko says:
January 20th, 2010 at 8:10 am
If your willing to be a father of 4 kids then go fo it. But you also gota think about the long run.Are you able to provide to this family of 5 and if it’s yes then go for it.
IslandAr says:
January 20th, 2010 at 10:42 am
TROUBLE!
Financial and emotional!
lyncds says:
January 20th, 2010 at 3:59 pm
Diving without learning how to swim.
jennifer says:
January 20th, 2010 at 9:12 pm
depends on you.
think long and hard b4 doing this.